Being in a relationship is hard work. For it to work out both of you have to put the effort in. Of course, some things are worth it and if you have found the right person for you then working on your relationship is something you should do. 

Here are some top tips to keep your relationship healthy and happy from someone who's been married twice and intends to stay married!

Go on regular dates

Make time for talking 

Talking is very important in a relationship, and not just talking - listening too. If you have any problems talking about it to your partner is very important in my humble opinion. If he or she won't listen to you when you are feeling sad, confused, angry or vulnerable and also when you are happy as well, do you really want to be in a relationship with them? You need to tell them that it is important for them to listen to you and if they won't then you really need to think is this the best it will ever be? Relationship counselling may be an option if you can't work out the issues between you. 

Get down to intimacy

Being intimate is an important part of a relationship. People's sex drives do vary however and this needs to be taken into consideration. An intimate relationship doesn't have to be just penetrative sex, there are other things you can do including mutual masturbation and oral sex. It's good to know what is pleasurable to yourself too, so you can tell your partner. Check out this website for further ideas to add some spice to your love life including the best vibrators and male masturbators. You can also be intimate without having sex too by cuddling and kissing, massaging each other and talking about sexual fantasies.  

Know where you stand on the big issues

It's important in a relationship to know where you stand on the big issues such as if you want children or not, who pays for what and how money is divided. It can be easier and more straightforward to have separate bank accounts and I always feel people should have a bank account that isn't in joint names so it's money that they can do with what they please. If the relationship broke down for any reason then they would have their own finances. 

Don't sweat the small stuff

Sometimes in a relationship, and especially the longer you have been together you realise not to sweat the small stuff. This means you need to know when to complain and stand your ground and when to let things go over your head without resentment. Sometimes it's not worth worrying about the small things, think - would this issue still matter a year from now.

It's the little things that matter 

Making a cup of tea for the other person without being asked, buying them a little present now and again, walking the dog when it's not your turn or making them breakfast in bed, these are the things that matter as they show that you are thinking of them and that you care. They help the day to day drudgery of life be that more bearable. 

Don't forget to apologise 

We don't always see eye to eye with our partners and may disagree and this could lead to an argument. If you do have a full-blown argument, get it off your chest so to speak and then when you've both calmed down apologise if any hurt was caused. It's never worth holding a grudge. Apologise or accept an apology if it's meant well and move on. 

So these are my top tips for a happy relationship. Do you have any tips for my readers?

*Collaborative post